In a related story, our dedicated staff interviewed Quimby Quinenberry of ‘Quinenberry Family Pharmacy’ ‘Portland, Oregon. He prefers being called simply ‘Q’ stated" The same thing is happening with our Mom & Pop Pharmacy. Not 'Jesus Nails' but 'The Apostle Peter's, ‘Stay Awake, for Christ's Sake Pills.' CVS and Walgreens are selling them at ridiculous prices. 'We just cannot compete.'

Further investigation found the aforementioned product, was actually being sold under the name, ‘Disciple Peter’s ‘Stay Awake for Jesus Sake Pills.' When told this, ‘Q’ was livid. 'People don't get it! Our product is made using genuine olive oil extract from trees in the 'Garden of Gethsemane.' Americans are stupid cheap. " After wrapping the interview, 'Q' was overheard on a hot mic muttering 'Judas bastards, Judas Iscariots.' Our research found that 'Judas Iscariot' was a minor member of a 1st Century Jewish terrorist group called: 'The Sacarii.' We could only find one quote, from this shadowy individual, outside of the Gospels, as recorded by Historian Josephus. "Better to sell your soul for thirty pieces of silver than to give it up for free. That’s would be really fakakta !”